The current dispute over Fiducia Suplicans is greatly disheartening. As I wrote in my last piece on this subject, the pope’s focus on responding pastorally comes from his own experiences of being with the people. He calls priests to follow his example.
Catholics angry over this document generally do not reflect this personal level of experience. They give no indication of speaking to parishioners who have same-sex attracted adult children and worry they will be alone throughout their lives.
The intense anger some Catholics express, I believe, has roots someplace in these people’s lives that needs healing. Two men who develop a strong relationship, even platonic, send some Catholics into the mode of Elijah killing the prophets of Ba’al. They will not react the same way in other situations God considers gravely sinful—living blind to the needs of others, paying tens of thousands of dollars annually for an elementary school education while doing nothing for the poor. These are abominations in the eyes of the Lord and they are not inclusive. I believe many who stand in their own righteousness over the Fiducia Suplicans will find they are on the wrong side of God’s plan of salvation, as were the Pharisees.
Leaving prayer out of the equation
Notice too, the word missing in all this rage, prayer. One of those who complained against FS is Archbishop Charles Chaput in his article for First Things: “The Cost of Making a Mess”. He also in a previous statement on Fr. James Martin, S.J. stated we have to teach the faithful to pursue virtue particularly the virtue of chastity. This is a sentence that angers me. It is true to a point but you can be an atheist and pursue virtue including chastity and many atheists do. The Catholic must pursue virtue prayerfully; prayer has to be the first priority. I do not read this teaching in the archbishop’s statements or those of others. I assume he implies an insistence on prayer.
A great error of modern Catholicism is demanding moral behavior while giving prayer short shrift.
In the first major papal document of Francis’ Pontificate the apostolic exhortation Evangelii Gaudium, the South American pope insists we must all be people of prayer and especially in adoration.
Without prolonged moments of adoration, of prayerful encounter with the word, of sincere conversation with the Lord, our work easily becomes meaningless; we lose energy as a result of weariness and difficulties, and our fervour dies out. #262
Everything Pope Francis states he founds in prayer. His critics focus on moral behavior. The pontiff demonstrates Catholics have a mandate to make their morality the fruit of their prayer.
An opportunity for catechesis
This brings us to the second point. Catholics, including bishops, will not bless same-sex unions for that would lend the parties to sin. No one should encourage sin but to turn someone away instead of using the moment for good evangelism is not of God at all. This dialog presents a perfect opportunity for catechesis by teaching the foundation of all forms of Catholicism is prayer. Indeed, the blessing is a prayer petition.
If one does turn away someone looking for a blessing, on what conditions does the priest invite them to return? When they are engaged to marry a person of the opposite sex, even though the marriage may fail because of the same-sex attraction? When they undergo conversion therapy? Rarely is it successful. When they swear on a bible to spend the rest of their lives alone until their death except when they attend Mass? On what conditions can the parties return?
This is always an important aspect of pastoral ministry. When a couple cohabitates and one of them seeks the Sacrament of Reconciliation, I explain I cannot absolve the penitent of the sin of sex outside of marriage until they no longer sleep in the same bed. Until then, the indication is the penitent has no intention of changing his or her life. So, I give the condition: when they are sleeping in separate beds, we can talk about absolution. Currently, the person is not ready to repent but I ask them to pray for assistance for that moment. There is a path to return. The catechism of the Catholic Church teaches the need to develop the skills of chastity in prayer and friendship.
Chastity includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery which is a training in human freedom. The alternative is clear: either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy. "Man's dignity therefore requires him to act out of conscious and free choice, as moved and drawn in a personal way from within, and not by blind impulses in himself or by mere external constraint. Man gains such dignity when, ridding himself of all slavery to the passions, he presses forward to his goal by freely choosing what is good and, by his diligence and skill, effectively secures for himself the means suited to this end." (CCC 2339) emphasis-not in italics- the original text.
So, I would ask those who refuse to submit to FS, on what condition would you invite those asking for a blessing to return? What would you teach them about prayer? What are you teaching about God’s love and mercy and the meaning of the faith life at this time?
The intense anger even by some bishops against this document reflects those who do not work in the field. They do not, as I said in the previous column, look into the eyes of their parishioners.
The role of the true pastoral minister is to lead people to conversion and to a prayer life that deepens their relationship with Jesus. The minister, priest, deacon, bishop or layperson will lead the person to understand their baptismal call to the prophetic nature of Catholic living.
Ministry on auto-pilot
One image that pops into my mind is an airplane on automatic pilot. The true pastoral minister will not out of hand reject FS but will work with it and if he won’t then he may be living his vocation on automatic pilot. He can follow the rules but when the skill of truly ministering to others is key, the person cannot do it. He only can be like a pilot sitting in the cockpit making sure the plane remains on autopilot.
The true pastoral minister will be skilled enough to do what he needs to do without compromising what the faith actually teaches and without casting aside sincere, men and women seeking Christ.
In our culture today, two men or two women who share a deep love for each other by default encounter the label gay. That is not the case throughout history. In fact, the Bible calls us to have deep friendships such as I stated in my previous article: 1 Samuel 18. This is a model of friendship in David and Jonathan, not a warning against it.
The current fight against Fiducia Suplicans continues to be tragic and may be the Holy Spirit revealing for priests and bishops the need to teach a morality which is the fruit of prayer not a moral code that leaves it out. Maybe it is the Holy Spirit who is making a mess to show us what we need to change in our ministry and catechesis.
Fr Robert J Carr is pastor at St. Anthony Parish in Allston, MA. He hosts The parish radio program and podcast, which can be found at the parish website and at catholicaudiomedia.com.
photo: CanvaPro